☆ human pet au ☆
。 scrapper is the first of the decepticons to get a pet, actually. megatron turns a blind eye because scrapper is a consumate professional and won’t let their human get in the way. he’s very lowkey about the whole thing at first and doesn’t talk about it with anyone, but he has the habit of taking his pet with him everywhere, feeding them by hand in the refectory, taking them with him to meetings with high command, and letting them nap in hook’s medbay (which initially got on hook’s nerves until they learned to nap in the pet bed scrapper made for them, of which there is also one in both the rec room and the constructicons’ personal quarters). actively encourage the other constructicons to interact with his pet, and lets scavenger keep them company when he has to go on a dangerous mission. tends to give his pet a lot of presents, most of them hand made, and is especially fond of giving them baths. on the rare occasions he lets his pet out on the surface, he indulges them to ride in his alt mode.
。 onslaught insists that his pet does not, in fact, belong to him; but is one of swindle’s (he’s just keeping an eye on his brother’s pet, that’s all) – this isn’t entirely a lie, since it was swindle’s idea to get onslaught a pet in the first place, and he pretty much just left a small human in onslaught’s care with the words “scrapper’s doing it, and he’s doing it so well. you don’t want to lose to that stuffy old gestalt commander, do you?” he takes a long while to warm up to his pet, but even during his so calledf distant and uninterested phase (which lasted an embarrassingly short time, thanks to vortex’s attempts to get his pet to ‘play’) he would systematically end up fussing over his pet whenever they’d end up alone together, and he tends to get inexplicably irritable whenever the other combatibros try touching his human. tends to show off how well behaved his pet is and constantly tries to one up scrapper when it comes to pampering said pet. he keeps his pet on him when he’s doing paperwork, and has a bad habit of talking his pet through his latest battle plans (he insists he’s just revising things out loud, but even brawl doesn’t buy it).
。 blast off is completely incorrigible when it comes to his pet – he’ll take them everywhere, and i do mean everywhere, it doesn’t matter if he’s going out on patrol in space or heading into town to draw out some pesky autobots, where he goes so does his pet. it’s safe to say that his pet is the only one he treats with anything more than his usual aloofness and detachment, and there are rumors going around that he can be quite intimate with his human. rumors which are true, as blast off is very much devoted to keeping his pet happy, and is quite fond of body worship and lots of tactile touching. he spends his off days locked in his quarters hand feeding his human sweets and alcohol, kissing their fingertips and whispering praise and devotions as he takes them in slow, lazy ways. don’t try touching his pet either, or he’ll make sure the next time you have to go out into space, he’s going to “accidentally” leave you behind.
。 soundwave is all about caring for his pet (if you couldn’t already tell he has a weakness for taking in little things, why do you think he has so many cassette children) – nothing quite gets him as enthused as cleaning his pet after they’ve gotten themselves all messy and disheveled, though he has a tendency to sometimes slip and treat his pet like a doll (the same can be said for scrapper and onslaught – maybe it’s a common trait among bots in charge of smaller clusters of bots). expect to spend hours in the tub with soundwave when he’s in the mood and has the time (somehow, he always has the time), being thoroughly pampered and treated like some kind of fragile perfect thing, methodologically cleaned up and treated to soothing music. disobedience is something he cannot tolerate though, and will discipline his pet with a firm spanking. there’s plenty of tender aftercare (which one could argue is incentive for his pet to misbehave again), and to be honest, he seems to get off on his pet rebelling against him.
。 tarn is a serial offender and the supreme king of pet spoiling. anything his pet wants they get, no matter how inane or obtrusive it might be (of course, this is granted that his pet always remains loyal to the cause, because tarn would absolutely hate to have to put them down). he’s openly affectionate with his pet, often scooping them up in his servos or perching them on his shoulder. forehead bumps are a constant thing, as is being held close against his spark and tentatively sung to (the first time his pet had heard him sing was when he’d stricken a name of the list, and they had been absolutely enamored with his voice ever since). he’s given his pet the dubious pleasure of seeing him without his mask in the privacy of his quarters, and such a thing is usually followed by poetry whispered against their ear while tarn uses his hands to make them come. indulges his pet so much that kaon is convinced tarn’s greatest weakness is small things (everyone looks at nickel and she flips them off in response).
。 thundercracker tends to use his pet as a way to cope with the cybertronian equivalent of ptsd. notice how his wings dip low in a way no flier’s should when they’re confined in a small space deep under the sea for extended periods of time when he’s with his pet? yeah well you aren’t the only one. he has a bad habit of overfeeding his pet, and he likes to share his human with the other seekers, but only when he’s around to keep an eye on them (skywarp keeps trying to take them for himself, and dirge is… well, dirge). can spend hours at a time curled up on the common room couch petting his human in soothing circles, running his blunt fingers along the length of their spine and making very small gasping noises when his pet places their tiny hands on his servos (good pet, very good).
☆ robot pet au ☆
。 exceedingly affectionate, swindle makes for an ideal pet for both first time and experienced pet owners. he’s self sufficient and sometimes tends to disappear in the middle of the night when his owner has fallen asleep, but come morning he’s always back, curled up at his human’s feet with wide bright eyes and the cutest smile you’ve ever seen. because being a pet isn’t too different from being another business venture for him, swindle is really good at reading what his owner likes and plays into their preferences very well. tends to favor acting rebellious while still being endearingly cute, and has a fondness for being fed by hand. takes naps all over the place, usually in hard to reach places like under a filing cabinet or behind the couch. enjoys lots of kissing and casual, lazy interfaces, chasing after orgasms and prolonging gratification in favor of another steady build up.
。 dead end is the poster child of high maintenance pets, tbh – he’s more like a giant metallic cat than anything else (don’t touch me but also look at me and tell me i’m beautiful okay you can pet my helm but only three times in a half circular motion anything less or more and i’ll run you over). as expected from someone as vain as he is, he’s very demanding when it comes to his grooming, although he’s willing to suffer his owner’s affections if he deems he’s been preened to perfection. definitely not the kind of pet for strenuous activities or menial tasks (don’t expect him to play with you, it’s all pointless and embarrassing). despite that, he’s actually intensely jealous and possessive towards his owner, and once his human manages to win his
begrudgingaffection, he’s likely to become exceedingly clingy, to the point where he sometimes becomes intrusive in his owner’s affairs. perfect for showing around fellow masters, and even better at showing off. spends an almost obscene amount of time working their owner up before giving them what they want, if you get my meaning.
。 vos isn’t exactly a user friendly pet (and this should come as no surprise to anyone, ever) – exceedingly finicky and almost impossible to please, he’s the kind of pet one should invest in if they want a challenge. he bites and nips and claws at all the furniture with absolutely zero regards for the consequences of his actions, and reacts increasingly negatively to punishment. the best way to placate him is just letting him do as he wants until he tires himself out, or alternatively, paying him absolutely no attention what so ever. which really irritates him to no end, so much so that he tends to become aggressively needy when he feels he is being ignored (expect lots of abrupt head buts that end up knocking one over as a sign of endearment from this pet). he’s rough and pushy with everything he does, interface included, and expect to get bitten at least twice, with lots of rough kissing (the kind that leaves bruises on the corners of your mouth) and scratches along your back and thighs.
。 misfire tends to be affectionate right off the bat, but his particular brand of affection seems to include nicking and hoarding his owner’s things, gently bullying them to get what they want, and the constant threat of trouble with law enforcement because he had the munchies. he’s the type to dig endless number of holes in your backyard, the type to track mud into your house and make an absolute mess of everything. his favorite things include playfully rough kisses and being rewarded with energon sweets – he has a habit of doing tricks when he wants your attention, and properly expects to be rewarded with a snack for being so amazing. don’t even try playing games that involve hand eye coordination (or any semblance of aiming) with this pet, he’s absolute shit. (well with a name like misfire, what did you expect?) unapologetically pushy, with greedy touches and even greedier demands when he decides he wants to make his master feel good for putting up with him.
。 whirl has the unfortunate habit of being abrasive, and will almost never let his owner touch him unless he’s been properly placated (read: spoiled with energon treats or allowed a particularly vicious play time). don’t be alarmed if you discover small dead things under the floorboards or other places whirl frequents, and don’t ask him about it either (he’s more likely to do it again, if you do). any attempt to sneak up on him or touch him without warning are met with extreme hostility (signs that he’s been abused before start making themselves pretty obvious after a while, which might have something to do with his confrontational attitude). can be territorial and is prone to becoming extremely jealous when his master pays attention to anyone or anything other than him for too long (and yet actively rejects almost all attempts at affection he himself doesn’t initiate). secretly, he likes to sleep in the same bed as his master, but overcompensates by pushing them off the bed when they comment on it. surprisingly gentle in bed, even more surprisingly submissive and you would not believe how thick his praises can get when one goes down on him (a gratifying ego boost, if ever).